Fall Scheduling

With it being the first week of September, that means that school has started and fall is on its way. This is the perfect time of year to reevaluate ourselves and how we spend our time. How are you going to spend your time this fall?


One of our consultants, Nicole Davis, shared how she has been reevaluating herself for fall:

As a new mom, I have gone from working full-time, to part-time so it has allowed me to spend time with my son. Over the past week I have been thinking about how easy it is for me to over-schedule our time together. I have always been one who doesn't like to miss out on any events or gatherings, and has a hard time telling others "no" when I am asked for assistance. I have been able to break down the word "over-scheduling" into three different categories that have helped me reevaluate and manage my time better.


1. Over scheduling ourselves (meeting friends for lunch, running errands... etc.)

2. Over scheduling our kids (signing them up for sports, music lessons, cooking classes, academic tutoring... etc.)

3. Over scheduling our minds (not unplugging from the world - phone calls, texts, social media... etc.)


So what is the solution? I have found that for me, it is helpful to schedule time to sit on the family room floor and play with my son. The more I take the time to unplug from the rest of the world and spend time with my son, the more I realize how fun it is to get to know his little personality better. I love our time together, and fear that these moments why he is young are going to slip through my fingers quickly as he grows up. Scheduling events for both me and my family are fun, needed, and very valuable, but I am going to make it a personal goal to keep all of our scheduling in moderation. What is the solution for you?

A Loving Mother Teaches Her Child To Walk Alone

"The loving mother teaches her child to walk alone. She is far enough from him that she cannot actually support him, but she holds out her arms to him. She imitates his movements and, if he totters, she swiftly bends as if to seize him, so that the child might believe that he is not walking alone...And yet, she does more. Her face beckons like a reward, an encouragement. Thus, the child walks alone with his eyes fixed on his mother's face, not on the difficulties in his way. He supports himself by the arms that do not hold him and constantly strives towards the refuge in his mother's embrace, little suspecting that in the very same moment that he is emphasizing his need for her, he is proving that he can do without her, because he is walking alone." 

-Soren Kierkegaard

The Power of Pausing & Slowing Down

When interacting with your child, are you ever caught off guard and don't know how to react? RDI Consultant Carol Subramani wrote a great article on pausing and slowing down, and how beneficial it is during these moments. Here is an excerpt from Carol's article published on RDI Connect:


As a parent, a pause provides you with an opportunity to choose your response or you can act on impulse.  Impulse says, “tell him what to do” or “he has not moved – I’ll point in the direction of his sandals” or “I’ll give him the remote so he stops screaming”.  It feels good in the moment that you have taken an action but it is not mindful.

You can use the power of the pause to change from emotional reactions to thoughtful responses. Whether you’re reacting to provocations or trigger words, remind yourself that you can pause to choose your best response.

A pause in the right place at the right time gives YOU:

• time to breath
• time to consider what it is you’re going to do or say next
• time to observe, receive and digest the feedback you are getting from your child

A pause in the right place at the right time gives YOUR CHILD:

• time to breathe
• time to consider or to let the images or ideas you’ve given them ‘flower’ in their minds
• time to process, understand or  summarize what’s been said
• time to prepare for what may be coming next

Consider this, you can:

• Pause before a particular important point to increase tension and add emphasis.  Pausing at irregular points can also increase tension.
• Pause after important points in order to let what you said or did, sink in.
• Combine pauses with dramatic action, such as uncovering something, pointing to something important, etc.
• Use non-verbal signals to emphasize the pause. A simple way of doing this is to freeze the body, perhaps with an expectant expression on your face.

Click here to read the entire article published on RDI Connect. 

Syncronized Brain Waves

Are you interested in studying more about the plasticity of the brain? Dr. Steven Gutstein, a co-founder of RDI, shares a very interesting article discussing the different brain waves that we each have.

If you are interested, click here to read the article

Slow down to speed up

"The best thing you can do is to slow your pace. Imagine your words cost money – therefore, you must budget accordingly. Speak less and be mindful of what’s going on between the two of you. This is no easy feat – but it will open the door to more meaningful interactions."

 - Sue Simmons

RDI Certified Consultant

Click here to read this entire article on her webpage, it is wonderful!

The Garbage Truck: A Touching Story

A 5 year-old boy with Autism loves to watch the garbage truck each week and runs outside to wave and greet the driver. It became a routine for him on the same day each week, that his mom decided to film him one morning. Unexpectedly, this morning was different than his usual routine. After emptying the garbage can, the garbage man got out of the truck and brought over a gift for the little boy. The garbage man didn't know that the boy had Autism, but said that he felt that God told him to buy this little boy a gift who greets him each week. The man expected to have no recognition from a parent, but the boy's mother just happened to be filming the garbage truck that day and recorded the interaction. This video has now gone viral, and has touched many people.

Click here to watch the video. 

Family Snowball Fight

It's time for another fun family activity! Let's have a snowball fight! To make this activity fun for your child on the Autism Spectrum, make sure that everything is prepared for the activity, and that boundaries are set. Put on snow clothes yourself, and have fun!


Here are some IDEAS on how to cater it specifically to your child:
- Help your child to make a pile of snowballs beforehand that they can use as their stash

- Depending on your child, have it be just you and your child, or include an additional parent or sibling into the activity

- If needed, make physical boundaries known to ALL participants before starting (this is his/her area and no one can cross into it - this may give more comfort to your child)

**This activity is FULL of uncertainty and surprises for your child that will create challenges to your child on their own. Be there to support, but also let your child "fight" for him/herself against everyone.

Make sure to set up the activity so that your child will feel confident in his/her ability to participate so do whatever accommodations to make this possible. Remember that it's about having fun, and now who is going to win or lose.

Mind Guiding

“The brain learns best when it is exercising in highly challenging, but low threat environments.” 21st Century Learning Initiative 

Dr. Steven Gutstein wrote a great article on Mind Guiding, which is one of the core functions of the remediation process of RDI. This is a great way to learn more about RDI, and what it means to be a "guide" to your child. Please contact us if you have any further questions!

Click here to read the entire article on RDI Connect

RDI in the Home: A Personal Story

One of our local RDI Moms, Jenny, wrote her thoughts and experience from doing RDI in her home with two of her children. Thank you Jenny for taking the time to write this for us!

RDI in the Home

by: Jenny

I have had a successful yet interesting experience with RDI in that I have worked with two of my children in the program.  RDI has become such an integral part of my life that it has greatly affected the way I parent and interact with my children on a daily basis.  I worked several years with my daughter working on collaborative play and activities that enhanced dynamic thinking.  She is now 7 and is the social butterfly of the neighborhood.  She loves to play with other peers and is self-motivated to think beyond herself and incorporate dynamic thinking to increase the enjoyment of her interactions with others.

I have also worked with my son with RDI and had immense success.  He lacked a lot of the social development that helps him read other people and use dynamic thinking when interacting with others.  But after a couple years of RDI he started to grasp how to read a social cues.  He now is able to make friends easily and has a group of friends he plays with regularly. RDI has greatly enhanced my children’s experience and enjoyment in interacting with other peers. They are able to share experiences and find meaning with their peers around them.

If you would like to share your personal experience with RDI, please contact nicole@pryorconsulting.net

Growth-Promoting Mental Challenge

Dr. Gutstein, one of the co-founders of RDI, wrote a very interesting article explaining a lot of the reasoning of why RDI is to helpful to develop the brain. He discussed the importance of "Growth-promoting mental challenge[s]."


Dr. Gutstein said, "Extensive research demonstrates that, while our drive for growth is inborn, our brains will only initiate neural growth-promoting programs under three specific conditions:

1. When learners perceive their environment as sufficiently safe and supportive.
2. When surplus physiologic & neural resources are available and that are not required for maintaining homeostatic life maintenance. If homeostatic demands are too great, then all of the brains resources will have to be devoted to maintaining the regulatory functioning of the organism.
3. When learners are provided with opportunities to engage with productive mental challenges, with the expectation that trusted guides will ensure that challenges do not become overwhelming."

Click here to learn more about RDI, and how it aides to the development of neural growth

Making Valentines

This month we are encouraging you to sit down at the table, get out the art supplies, and enjoy some time with your child. Since Valentine's Day is coming up, it is time to make some Valentines! How could you make this art project into a RDI activity with your child?

Here are some simple steps to follow:
1. To start, decide if you are going to sit side-by-side with your child and each make your own Valentine for someone, or if you are going to make one together. This may depend on which situation you feel your child will be the most successful. Make this decision before involving your child and starting the activity.

2. Explain what a Valentine is to your child (if he/she need it), and ask who they would be interested in making a Valentine for. If our child needs a little prompting, suggest a few people that they would be interested in, and also others they would NOT be interested in. Let your child make the choice.

3. Now you can either just start, or if your child needs a little help, start brainstorming what the Valentine is going to look like. Are you going to use words or just pictures?

Please remember that there are a TON of different ways to make a Valentine. There is no right or wrong way, it is just great practice for your child to make decisions and work together with you. It is okay if your child chooses to do a brown and green Valentine instead of a red and pink one. It is about the PROCESS of making it together instead of the end PRODUCT of the card itself.

Adding Challenge Through Laundry

Have you had your child help you with the laundry? Bimal Rai, a RDI Consultant from Singapore, wrote a very simple article on how to get your child involved with doing laundry. She goes through each step of how to make it a good RDI learning experience through adding challenge.

To read her article on RDI Connect, click here

Relationship Skills vs. Social Skills

"Relationships teach us about multiple perspectives and provide the experience to show us that there is more than one right way of thinking, feeling, solving a problem and behaving. Through relationship encounters, we see the world through another's eyes and notice it is not identical to our own. Relationships teach us to think about the world in a relative and not absolute manner. In a relationship our actions cannot be interpreted as right or wrong. Rather, they are meaningful or not depending on how they impact the individuals involved in the relationship. Rather than pushing a button or following a script, relationships require us to constantly evaluate and re-evaluate the state of our connection to one another and make ongoing adjustments."

- Dr. Steve Gutstein

HOW IS YOUR CHILD AT HAVING TRUE RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS? Dr. Gutstein, a co-founder of RDI, wrote a very interesting comparing relationship skills to social skills. He describes the skills needed to "fit in" with those around, but also the skills that need to be developed to build true and lasting relationships.

To read this article by Dr. Gutstein on RDI Connect, click here

Do You Want to Build a Snowman?

The song, "Do You Want to Build a Snowman?" from the Disney movie Frozen has been quite popular this year:

I'm right out here for you, just let me in
We only have each other
It's just you and me
What are we gonna do?

Do you wanna build a Snowman?

This part of the song creates a great moment after Anna invites her older sister Elsa to build a snowman with her. What a great opportunity for them to spend time together!

Playing in the snow can be turned into the most wonderful family RDI activity. If you can find a good day when the temperature isn't too cold and there is some fresh snow, it can make for a fun afternoon with your child.

Ideas on how to make building a snowman into a RDI activity:
- Both parent and child can push a big snowball together to create part of the snowman


- Between parent and child, you can split up the work - each of you roll your own snowman and then combine them to make a two-snowballed snowman

- Both parent and child can work together making a big pile of snow to be your snowman

- Both parent and child can problem solve together of how to make the flat snow on the ground look like a snowman. Make sure to validate your child's ideas, and be creative on how to "invent" your own snowman together.

They most important thing to remember is that you and your child are WORKING TOGETHER. It is important to remember that it is okay if your snowman doesn't end up looking like a "typical" snowman with three stacked snowballs. Be creative, and enjoy having fun together!

A Relationship with My Daughter: A Personal Story

"A long time ago, Anna never said or called me mom, now I can happily say, there is not a day that goes by that I do not hear her call me mom. Also, eye contact is no longer an issue. She is engaged and happy. I can tell her no and it is not going to be a melt down. I no longer fear for her future."

- Ann

ARE YOU INTERESTED IN READING PERSONAL STORIES? This story is taken from a RDI Mom who shared a story about building a relationship with her daughter. Ann said, "I feel the best thing I can give [my daughter] is my time."

Click here to read this article on RDI Connect

Connect Four: A Personal Story

Do you enjoy reading PERSONAL STORIES from our local RDI families? Kristi, one of our RDI moms, wrote a very inspirational article about an experience that her husband had while doing RDI with her nine-year-old son. This is a great example of how to teach a big life lesson through a simple activity.

Connect Four

by: Kristi

Nine-year-old Duncan and my husband sat at the kitchen table this morning playing Connect Four. This is not a challenging game for Duncan. The challenging aspect of any game, for him, is losing a game. My husband purposely plays the same move over and over again. Duncan keeps winning over and over again; as my husband literally drops the “coins” in the same slots. By game number 5 Duncan is onto him. First he asks, “Why are you letting me win?” Then he says he doesn’t want to play anymore because it isn’t a challenge. A few more games of this and Duncan is ready to move on. My husband asks him, “but don’t you like to win? You get upset when you don’t win.” Duncan says, “It isn’t a real win, if there is no challenge.” Then they talk about what challenge really is. Duncan says, “I guess you have to lose sometimes so that you can have a real win. “ Then they play some real games where they each win a few games. Duncan’s wins are more celebrated than before and his loses become no big deal. It isn’t always this quick of a fix, but it is these principles that are teaching Duncan how to deal with uncertainty.

This is one example from our family’s RDI life. The most valuable thing that RDI has taught me is that the connections and “rules of life” need to be learned through experiences. In our home we have 2 autistic children. Even though they both have ASD, they exhibit opposite characteristics of the spectrum. Where one is sensory seeking, the other is avoidant, where one is anxiety/perfectionist driven, the other checks out. But RDI is working for both children because they are learning from actual experiences with natural consequences. 

Spotlight the Problem, not the Solution

"Being an effective guide is 95% mindset and 5% what you actually do. Our mindset and point of view are the roots from which all decisions are made. When I’m given a mere hour or half day to try to explain in a meaningful and practical way what RDI is, I focus on a simple phrase that encompasses a guiding mindset."

"Spotlight the problem, not the solution."

This was taken from an article written on Guiding Families Hawaii's blog. It is a wonderful article that helps all of us remember the importance of a guiding mindset. We encourage you all to read this article, it will be of benefit to you and your family as you are doing RDI.

Click here to read the article on Guiding Families Hawaii's company blog

New Years Challenge to YOU

"SETTING GOALS IS THE FIRST STEP IN TURNING THE INVISIBLE INTO THE VISIBLE"

- Tony Robbins

Has the time that you spend doing RDI with your child become invisible? With the new year just passing, January is the perfect time to stop and reflect on our own lives. What am I doing well? Where can I improve? We are not here to tell you the answer to either of these questions, but to encourage you to stop and ponder about your own life.

From our Pryor Consulting family, we challenge you to reflect on your own life and see where you could cut back on spending time, and replace it with meaningful RDI time spent to enrich your child's life. Could you take an extra 10 or 15 minutes a day to spend with your child?

New Year's Day

"Every time you tear a leaf off of a calendar, you present a new place for new ideas and progress."

- Charles Kettering

What new ideas are you going to pursue during 2015?

We want to wish you all a Happy New Year, and we hope that your upcoming year will be filled with lots of joy!