Plain Cheeseburgers
by: Angela
Jace loves cheeseburgers! He would eat one every day if he
could, but I figure a burger once a week won’t kill him. At a recent meeting
with Scott, he suggested that Jace should have more responsibility, and should order
his own food.
The first time I tried this out, we went through a
drive-thru. As I usually do, I asked my kids what they wanted. As usual, Jace
said that he wanted a cheeseburger, fries, a toy, and a coke. After we got the
food, I handed Jace his bag. He unwrapped his cheeseburger and took a bite and
yelled out, “A PICKLE!?” To his surprise, his cheeseburger was not plain as it
usually is, it had everything he didn’t like and he was not happy about it at
all! He began to have a mini-meltdown and told me to get him a new one. I
explained to him that he asked for a cheeseburger, and that is the way
cheeseburgers are made at the restaurant; the workers don’t know that he likes
plain burgers. He yelled at me to wipe everything off, but I knew he was
capable of doing it, so I told him that he could it he didn’t want the rest on
there. He wiped it off and then ate the burger. (Food ended up all over the seats
of my car, but shhhh, don’t tell my husband that part!)
The next time we went to that same restaurant, he made sure
to order a plain cheeseburger. However, when we went to a different restaurant,
he ordered “a cheeseburger” and once again, he had to learn the hard way. After
this experience, he understood that when he goes out to eat, he needs to specify
the things he doesn’t like. I’m happy to report that he hasn’t had a burger
with “everything” on it since! WIN!
This experience has helped me to realize that my son is
capable of learning from his mistakes. If I allow him to fail, it gives him the
chance to make changes and adjustments the next time. Life is not perfect, so why would I make a perfect life for him? It is MUCH easier to
avoid a meltdown and simplify things for him, but if things were always
easy, he would never learn and grow. Now that I know he can learn from ordering
cheeseburgers, this same concept can be applied to many other scenarios.
Life is a journey, as is my son’s progress; there is no
“finish line.” Up until this point, I have always questioned and wondered when
he would “get there,” but I have accepted that there will always be a new goal,
a new “finish line.” If you’ve ever run a race or exercised, you know that
progress can be slow, but it’s still progress, and after you run that first
race, or after hit a PR (personal record) on the amount of weight you bench
press or squat, you want to push yourself and run further or lift heavier. If
we are truly invested in something, the journey never ends. Though at times it
is tough, I am going to embrace the “now” and everything that Jace has
accomplished thus far. We will still work hard to make progress and set new
goals. Without growth, things will wither away. So I will be here, cheering my
son on through this crazy, amazing journey called life.
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